Thursday, March 8, 2012

Never Sew when Mad

It never ends well.

I really didn't do much today. I'm a bit stuck in my doll sewing at the moment. It's supposed to be a creative week, but I certainly don't feel very creative at the moment. I guess I used up all my creative energy when I got both that Fashion Queen and Ken dressed and moved from the Naked Party Pad late last month. At the time I did have several ideas for other dolls, but the more I thought about them the less I liked, so I ended up deciding against what I was planning to make.

I have been noticing a disturbing trend lately. I've been becoming increasingly hypersensitive. It's weird, lately whenever anything bad happens, no matter how small, no matter how easily it should roll off my back, it manages to upset me far more than it should. I'm not normally like it (or at least I normally don't think I am), but for the last week or so I've noticed that the littlest things to go wrong affects me in a really harsh way. I guess I'm feeling a lot of frustration right now and while I'm trying to stay above it, the second anything goes bad I fall right back into it. Even sewing falls under that problem. I was sewing something today, just really to sew something (which is still something I do), and the moment I ran into an issue, anger flared up. Instead of dealing with it, or stopping and calming down I just kept going. And I actually ended up breaking a needle (Oops!). I kind of think it was both my fault and the fact the needle was pretty dull. I was trying to make it go through several layers of fabric at one time, but it was also way overdue for a new needle.
So I sewed while angry. Made most of the dress. Hate it, don't plan on working on it again to finish it. It's just ugly and terrible. So really, I could have skipped sewing and had the exact same result.
I hope these anger issues clear up. I don't like being this way.

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